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Side Chick Material: 101

Let me guess, you're "that" girl that will change him?

As harsh as it seems, it's cut and dry: a man will not change until he is ready to change, especially in the case of side chick syndrome. 

Funny Flirting Ecard: If I had a girl, I'd make you my main side chick... Just sayin'.What is side chick syndrome? Ahhh! Let me explain. Side chick syndrome is when a male is in a monogamous relationship and stumbles upon a third wheel, another female who knows and understands his situation but decides to stay in high hopes that he will leave his girlfriend. He now has he best of both worlds. His lady and his side lady. She doesn't demand much because she doesn't want to annoy him or get him caught. He really likes the fact that she is faithful to him. (SN: isn't it crazy that there are side chicks out here more faithful than the main chicks?!) Anyways... with her high hopes, she gets so lost in the motions that she allows herself to be second, permanently. The male KNOWS this. He knows you are obviously OK with being the second/side chick and therefore breaks no mold. 

"But I'm different," you say? As true as that may be, he is still the same. 

Now, I'm no guru on this stuff, love that is; but you'd be living in Neverland to let yourself fathom the thought of teaching an old dog new tricks. 
This is not an article to 'bash' males, or even females, but a mere bug in the ear of illogical reasoning. 
Ladies, ladies, ladies, I'm sure we've all heard Lyfe Jennings' "Statistics"; it's one my favorite songs. Why? Because aside from Lyfe's ability to put matters into perspective, he, from the point of view of a male shone light on some statistics of relationships. There are four rules. Follow these rules and there is some percent of a chance that you do not become side chick material.

Rule one: don't be a be a booty call. If he don't respect you, he will forget you. 
--booty calls may be one of the biggest contributors to the reason males refuse to let go of bad habits and further neglect to cure themselves of 'side chick syndrome'. Somewhere out there, there is a  female that a male KNOWS he can call and she will beyond a shadow of a doubt pick up and give up the goodies. That, ladies, is not respect. He can't respect you if all he wants from you is sex and you make yourself available. ESPECIALLY if he has a girlfriend. That's a double no no!
Not sure if you've been a victim of the booty call? 
I'm not sure about you guys but in my neck of the woods, any call/text/DM/Etc. After 10PM is considered official booty call hours. 
If he hasn't talked to you all day but after 10 you get hit with the, "whatchu up to" text, you have been booty called! ABORT!!

Rule two: if he's in a relationship, and he will cheat on her best believe he'll cheat on you. 
--DON'T EVER think he will leave his girlfriend for you. It may happen every here and there but, if he did it WITH you, he will do it TO you. That's the first sign. Yes, guys change but allow the change to occur in favorable situations. Maybe he's just not happy at the time with "her" but unless he leaves her and then pursues you, congratulations you are contribution to him getting his cake and eating it too. 



Rule three: tell him that you're celibate and if he want some of your goodies he going to have to work for it.
--before you skip it, think about it! How many of us want something more when we can't have it and how many if us appreciate it once we've worked for it? Case and point! It sounds impossible, but I PROMISE, sex isn't everything. Too many people are focused on how quick they can have sex and how many people they can do it with they forget to focus on the fact that, for one, sex is for the married couple and two, everyone isn't even worthy of your body. Both men and women. 


Rule four: be the person you wanna find; don't be a nickel out here lookin' for a dime.
--I believe in equals! The most opposite of people can be compatible, so that's not my point. I am not a supporter of someone being a cheater seeking a virgin, faithful, devoted mate. That's just disrespectful ! For what religious reason would you plan on ruining that poor persons view on humans?! (LOL) 

The perfect contradiction of the situation is that most side chicks have the ability and potential to be main chicks, they just allow themselves to practice self discipline, and patience; most importantly self worth. NEVER allow yourself to be second to anyone.
Yeah, I know, it's easier said than done. Just try :)

Don't contribute to a guys side chick syndrome. If he wants to be with you, make sure he is with YOU! Not you Sally, Susie, and Janet.
Don't be side chick material, just don't do it.

-Channy

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