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The Five-Year Engagement Theory

This is another submission from our lovely Cali contributor, Rachel Zeigler. Enjoy!

 After watching the five year engagement...(which I'm aware is just a Hollywood movie which is not real life!)
It made me feel all warm and fuzzy! This woman meets a man.... she is offered her dream job and he quits his job, leaves beautiful California! (I was born and raised in Cali so I'm aware of the greatness first hand) to relocate for his fiancé!
            Sweet right? As a typical woman...she eventually becomes complacent with her fiancé as he in a depression. He leaves his great career to relocate to snowy, cold Michigan where he currently works at a deli.
            Although he is miserable, he never complains! He stays and makes the best of the situation for his love for his fiancé! It's quite beautiful! But.... it is always a but lol..
The unable to see and appreciate the sacrifice this man makes for her and in my opinion...
 she is totally being a selfish woman who is young and living life. I can relate to this woman in a sense. Not in full depth but somewhat. She has this awesome man who is hardworking, adores her and will do anything for her but yet she is not sure! She is indecisive and always looking for the "fresh doughnut" (if you seen the movie you would get the reference) but basically... After five years of this man sacrificing his happiness for her, she still is not sure! After complaining to another man and a few other events she finally decides.
            The time is right and they plan a cheap, rushed wedding. Long story short the wedding does not happen and soon after they decide to end things and go separate ways. The man returns back to California and his career and the woman stays in Michigan and excels in the work place. They begin new relationships yet still think of each other time to time. And eventually reconnect. The woman decides he is the right man and they both plan to propose to each other and they get married and live happily ever after.
            So my question is.... as young adults we are learning, growing and embracing the selfish years so naturally mistakes will occur. This woman had this dedicated, loving man and yet she still wasn't happy and sure about the relationship! Given the two were totally different career wise but they love each other and they worked well together...I believe in the back  of her mind, she was not content and was not sure that she was with the right man.
            How are we as young adults and ever changing people to know we are with the right one unless...we date around? Sometimes some people need that reassurance! I myself am a very indecisive person and it is a horrible quality. I am a person who can never decide between...which flavor ice cream or between the pizza and the pasta. No matter the choice, I'm sure after tasting the meal I would have wished I ordered the other meal or flavor instead! So either way I would not be satisfied. Smh so learning to make a choice and be committed is something this 22 year old is still learning!
            I was happy they were both able to step out the relationship and date around and really realize that what they shared was Special and was what they both really wanted! I know...I know….I know this IS only a film but I truly enjoyed it and was glad to see that these two end up together!
            I see it as...two people who belong together will always end up together, so while your young, explore and shop around so when you decide it's will really be right! Not everyone needs to shop around but us indecisive people need that reassurance to know its real!
            I'm not saying its right...but that's how it is sometimes…people always say life is not fair...
I'm a forever changing and growing person and I'm fully aware of that. I change my mind like I change my panties everyday! 
 Some where I heard an mature woman saying "ohhh 
I would hate to be 20 again, hardest years of my life. I was broke and didn't know anything..." And that has stuck with me, I can see where she is coming from as a recent college graduate who is jobless, careless and becoming a very good nomad...I get IT! 

 Keep your head up...your heart clean and your intentions great!

It will make sense eventually! 
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